| I want very long hair. Ridiculously Long. Wipe My Ass Long. I'm going for high impact. I should get extensions.
I want new shoes. Wedges to be exact. Those cute ones by Michael Kors. To go with the new scooter shorts I want so badly. Just in time for summer.
I want a new purse. I never buy purses. But this isn't a matter of want - it's a matter of necessity. I don't want just any bag. I want a Balenciaga bag. A black one. The black one that Sienna Miller carries.
I want my Ga-Damn Wolf Form. I take that back. I need a Ga-Damn Wolf Form. Rodman is a horrible assistant. He pokes pins into my ass. Sometimes for fun. Shit, I poke pins into my own ass. But not for fun.
You know what this means?
It means I should find some money to pay for all of these I want.
Which ultimately means - I need to find a fucking job.
[Dramatic Pause inserted here]
On second thought..
My hair grows at supersonic speed. No need for extensions.
Going barefoot isn't so bad.
Purse? To hold what money?
My ass is heavily padded.
Yeah. Life is good again. | comments: Leave a comment   |
| Man. I suck.
And Gracie stinks. (Wet dog with period funk and bad breath - from licking period funk.) Yuck.
I have about 15 fashion magazines spread out, chaotically, all over the floor. What am I doing?
Searching for inspiration.
Isn't it strange, how when I go to bed, my mind cranks out a multitude of original designs, to the point where I have to tell myself, "Nhat, shut it down and get some shut eye", but yet when it's time to produce a portfolio, my mind draws a painfully white blank?
Why is that?
You know what I need? I need a muse, although I've always said that I am my own muse. But that bright idea isn't working so well right now. Perhaps I need a new approach? I've always been a procrastinator, supporting the notion that I work much better under pressure. And for the most part, this has played out to be somewhat accurate. However, I don't think now would be the time to pull an "overnighter".
(Man, Gracie smells.........pewwww wweeee)
I gotta get back to work. | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Elton John - Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word | | Time: | 08:05 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/charitycam/goth_girl/thoughtful.gif) contemplative |
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| In the midst of driving along highly congested roadways, I started to feel the close proximity to the Christmas Holiday. I know for sure that this year will not be one of superficiality and overflowing piles of presents, probably because 1. I'm older 2. I'm lower maintenance, and 3. Most importantly, I'm poorer this year than any other year. And I know I asked for intangible things in my last entry, but I suppose Christmas wouldn't be Christmas if I didn't ask for bogus fantasy items, right? I think I've traded up on aesthetically pleasing items for the more useful and practical tools.
1. First and Foremost, I'd like an acceptance letter from THE Fashion Institute of Technology in New York City.
2. The complete set of 144 Prismacolor Markers
3. An annual subscription to Women's Wear Daily publication
4. A Dewalt 12 inch Double Bevel Compound Miter Saw
5. A Singer Quantumlock 5 Serger
6. "THE" Laptop
Rodman says that had I not bought two pairs of shoes and a pair of boots, I would've been able to knock out at least three or four of the six. His exact words were, "I see where your priorities are."
My reply, "Nhat will always be Nhat. I don't compromise my shoes."
Well, I know I can live without most of this stuff, but I'd die if I don't get Numero Uno. | | comments: 4 comments or Leave a comment |
| I am in total disbelief that Christmas will be arriving in less than two weeks. I've been labeled as he Grinch this year, but little do they know, I'm an undercover Grinch every year. I only do what I do for the children.
And after Christmas comes the finale of 2004. Am I ready for this year to end?
Undoubtedly yes.
Am I ready for the New Year?
Not necessarily.
Why? Because I had given myself until the end of this year to figure what I need to do with my life.
Have I figured it out yet?
No.
Will I ever figure it out?
Probably not.
Will I try?
Definitely.
Year end festivities tend to propel me to reflect upon this year's past events, tragedies, lessons, and experiences. It is no secret that this year has been extremely difficult - financially, emotionally, and spiritually. It pains me to sit here and think about the traumatic turmoil I've had to endure this year alone but yet I smile wholeheartedly at the great strides I've made in my life this year as well. I've grown tremendously in such a short period of time. I've learned more about myself than I've ever learned in the past 26 years. I've learned what's important, what isn't important, who matters, and who don't.
It's eleven days until Christmas and I have yet to conjure up a solid Christmas list. So I guess I'll take a stab and ask for:
1. That my little baby nephew Paul leaves his little incubator and goes home to his Mommy and Daddy.
2. Clarity in my life
3. And the courage to do whatever it takes to seek the clarity I so do need.
Oh, yeah......and world peace. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | tempting... | | Time: | 02:19 am | | Current Mood: | nostalgic |
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| I'm so tempted.
Perusing the familiar frames of Livejournal,
I feel an inkling of nostalgia.
My fingers do the typing...
and as my words flow,
I feel the sharp nudge saying No...don't do it.
So I'll refrain.
I'll stop the fingers.
Stop the clicking....
I guess I'm not ready after all.
Sorry folks.
hehe. | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| Hello All.
Just zipping by tonight, seeing if all is quiet on this home front. I'm stunned that I've refrained from LJ for a whopping three months.
I must admit, it does feel good to relinquish digital connectivity from the world.
Life has been very interesting, to say the least, but I'm learning to adjust, cope, and seek meaning in this whirlwind of events - my tornado. I try to keep my head high, my heart beating, and find circulation to my lungs - at times, this does pose to be difficult.
They say everything happens for a reason, although sometimes, it's just harder to uncover, but sooner or later, everything unfolds.
I try to stay focus.
I try to stay strong,
for I know I am resilient.
Now having said that,
Nhat - time to exhale darling. | | comments: 4 comments or Leave a comment |
| Gracie and I share a secret.
And I know for a fact -
that Gracie will take my secret to her grave.
When it's just me and my Grace,
I dance like a fool.
I jam to my own beat.
I get down like James Brown.
I bounce like American Idol's George Huff.
I jiggle like Missy Elliot.
And the whole entire while,
Gracie stares at me with those Big Black eyes like I'm some sort of retarded chicken.
This is where, if her eye sockets were big enough, she would roll her eyes.
Trust me, you'll never have to witness it.
I saw Shrek 2 with Rodman. It is fucking hilarious. It is by far the funniest movie I've seen this year. I've always been fond of humor, but I've come to appreciate wit and banter more. It's definitely a MUST SEE. | | comments: 6 comments or Leave a comment |
| I'm so glad I take so many pictures of Gracie - documenting her rapid growth spurt into an adult dog. Her legs are long and gangly, her ears now droop, and the last patch of her puppy hair has shed.
My little girl is all grown up.
**sniff sniff**
Dogs grow up so quickly don't they? So do kids. By the end of this month, my little nieces will have graduated from high school. Just the other day, they were twelve and were asking for stickers. Now they ask for big ticket purses, make up, designer denim, and my I.D. It just amazes me how quickly time has flicked on by...
As I sat there listening to the warming, inspirational speeches at the graduation ceremony, I found myself cruising down memory lane, remembering when I was in the white gown, sitting down there amongst my fellow graduates, with stars in my eyes, gleeing with hopeful expectations of "what the world had to offer" and excitement about "embarking upon a new chapter in my life"....
Yada yada yada.
Oh please. Whatever...I was quick to snap back to reality.
As they wrapped up the last of the speeches, I wanted to stand up and yell, "The Real World SUCKS. GOOD LUCK Suckas!"
If only I knew then what I know now.......
"and knowing is half the battle."
Still, Congrats to my little Smell Mel, my mini-me. The other one is celebrating her big day this week....
 | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | **sigh** | | Time: | 12:41 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/charitycam/goth_girl/happy.gif) chipper |
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| I'm not one to engage in watching teeny bopper movies, but since I was with my niece, I allowed her to indulge in her penchant for such flicks - so we ended up watching Mandy Moore's "Chasing Liberty". I do have to say, I may not have a preference for such movies, but I do have the hots for the little cute boys they cast. Man........what I would do to be young again....hehhee.
I scored "THE" shoes yesterday. I told Rod that it "was calling my name" AND "that it was meant to be. I found two pairs of YSL's, one in black and one in red in MY SIZE. When I decided to pass and walked to the next store, there it was again, only this time, it was ONE SINGLE pair in MY SIZE. Man...........they're hot, crazy looking, but hot. I can't wait to sport them.
You would think that after such a long hiatus from LJ, I would have more to say than that eh?
Guess I'm not of many words after all....
**sigh** | | comments: 8 comments or Leave a comment |
| I don't know which makes me sadder, the end of Friends or the end of Frasier.
Damn - I feel like the world of television is ending.
First, Sex and the City.
Next, Friends.
Now, Frasier.
What is this world coming to?
Frasier recited this on air during his Goodnight, Seattle sign off. I found it perfect for my own personal life at this time...
Ulysses
Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Come, my friends,
‘Tis not too late to seek a newer world.
Push off, and sitting well in order smite
The sounding furrows; for my purpose holds
To sail beyond the sunset, and the baths
Of all the western stars, until I die
It may be that the gulfs will wash us down:
It may be we shall touch the Happy Isles,
And see the great Achilles, whom we knew.
Tho’ much is taken, much abides; and tho’
We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are:
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield. | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| If I had all the money in the world...
I wouldn't buy the nicest cars.
I wouldn't buy the biggest houses.
I wouldn't buy diamonds and baubles...
I would buy me bolts and bolts of the finest fabric money can buy.
**sigh**
I had restrained myself from going to the finest fabric store in New Orleans for about four months - because I seemed to have built somewhat of a stash at home - and then I wait for the inspiration. Not many of those lately....so when I showed up today, Jerry asked me, "Where have you been sweetheart?" And was I ever glad I showed up today.
On assignment, I stopped by the uber modern and ritzy fabric store to peruse the many aisles and tables of bolted fabric in search of the "perfect" swatch of silk for my new prospective commission. After months and months of requesting stretch material, Jerry finally listened and ordered in a ton of stretch. I was in stretch Mecca - marigold yellow silk crepe, the richest blue silk I've ever seen, waves of silk satin in every hue of the rainbow - majestic silver, royal purple, severely burnt sierra, and the most decadent rippling of fuchsia magic. When I saw the fuchsia, I thought I was in silk heaven.
Cost of heaven: $39.00 bucks a yard.
Damn. Bill Blass is expensive eh?
So instead, I picked up the last 2.5 yards of this pale pink delight. Pale is not something I usually do, but it's darling. I had to. It was dwindling on the cardboard bolt, just waiting to be taken out of it's misery. So I bit.
As for the little bit of fuchsia heaven..
I'll have to call Jerry in the morning. | | comments: 5 comments or Leave a comment |
| I got back to New Orleans pretty late.
Had Friends, Survivor, CSI, Jay Leno all on TiVO.
TiVO let me down.
He taped all the shows,
but because the show ran a tad bit long,
he didn't tape the end of Friends.
All I got was Rachel showing up back at Ross' apartment,
they kissed....
and the wretched "DING" came on and asked if I wanted to Delete.
Fuck.
As for Survivor -
I have never seen such stupid dumb people make it to the final five.
They should have rallied up and voted Amber out.
Such dumb asses.
But hey - Big Tom may be dumb as the dumb redneck he is, but at least he's honest and a man of his words. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Usher's new track "Burn" has been spinnin on repeat. I'm the type of person that KILLS a song by overplaying - kinda like the radio stations. It's just too bad my tongue can't roll words quickly like that Usher.
Aunt Flow finally came to visit me this morning. Whew! It's been a while - and I guess it's all this "stress" that has compounded, causing me to derail off my feminine balance.
Something has been bothering me lately, but I just can’t seem to put my finger on it. The unsettling feeling twirls in my head, yet I have no idea what it is, but I can feel it eating away at me.
Is it just uncertainty that inhibits me?
It retrospect, I feel that in the past four months, earth shattering events have manifestly ensued, and it’s only now that I feel the blowback. The whirlwind of the future is constantly emblazoned in my head, sometimes nonchalantly, sometimes vigorously. I’ve come to understand that Life is like that of the Domino Effect. One person’s life affects another – we’re all intermingled in some sick way.
I don’t know what I’m talking about.
Anyway. I have cramps. Gotta go pop some magic blue pills. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| Last year, secretly, I submitted an application to FIT - The Fashion Institute of Technology in New York City. When they reviewed my application and sent portfolio requirements, I brushed it aside, for my goals had changed by then. Besides, I saw requirements and I became chicken shit.
They wanted an essay.
They wanted answers to a string of questions.
They wanted transcripts.
They wanted sketches.
That was the last of it.
However, today, I pulled up the application and went to the website.
They said they were no longer accepting applications for certain fields for Fall 2004. So I called asking about the other majors. The admission officer pulled up my SSN and said that the maximum quota didn't apply to me, for I had submitted my application ahead of time.
She said, "Just finish up your portfolio, and send it in."
So I went and dug up the portfolio requirements.
And you know what?
Half of it had been completed.
I make my own clothes.
Duh.... | | comments: 6 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | Going Mad | | Time: | 10:05 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/charitycam/goth_girl/sad.gif) bored |
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| 
Congratulations Newlyweds!!!!!!
I am officially bored.
Bored to bloody death.
I've read all I could read.
I've watched all I could watch.
I've slept all I can sleep.
I even cleaned house today.
I desperately need something to do.
But what?
Wanna hear something crazy?
And this is a true story.
Talk about a Catch-22.
There is a lady.
She had four kids.
The oldest one sexually abused the other three.
He was sent to Juvenile.
His release is coming up.
The law mandates that the mother take her child back.
However, if she does, the authorities threaten to take her other three children into state custody.
But, if she refuses to take her 14 year old back, she'll be arrested by the state.
So what is a mother to do? | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| We went to the French Quarter on Friday to kill some time. As predicted, we ended up at Saks, perusing their current shoe collection. As Tony was getting a pair of shoes for me in the stock room, Lillian, the other shoe salesperson, overheard my conversation with Rodman. She gazed at us for a while, and as I was admiring a pair of Gucci's, she said, "You two make a perfect couple. I'm serious."
So I chuckled a little bit, and thought about it, and the thought passed. But as I was going through looking at my pictures from yesterday, I realized, that she was absolutely right.
 | | comments: 5 comments or Leave a comment |
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